"Sweetness Follows"

Critical perception is a funny thing. When I hear that a new movie is getting good reviews, I normally accept that fact, and deem it worthy of a listen or a screening. But for movies that were made before I was born, it's a lot more difficult to have an opinion about them because I was not alive to get the first hand information needed to determine if I should see them or not. Let me explain this a little further.

Back in 1972, The Godfather was released. Unless you have been locked in Buffalo Bill's basement hole for the last couple of decades, you are aware of the fact that Coppola's gangster masterpiece is generally considered one of the greatest movies of all time. So, being born when I was, I was never able to fully understand the fact that at the 1972 Oscars, The Godfather took home only 3 Oscars. Now, in all fairness, one of those awards was indeed the Best Picture honor, but the amazing thing is that another film, Cabaret, won 8 statues that year. Now, because I have always associated the former movie as "one of the greatest of all greats", my perception of Cabaret has always been rather low. I've never really had any desire to see it because I've always expected it to be over rated. A movie that was only appreciated around the time it was released, and one that has not aged as well as The Godfather.

In case you can't tell where I'm going with this, I'll just let the cat out of the bag. I have now seen Cabaret and it is really quite brilliant. To the point where I eventually had no problem admitting that Bob Fosse may have in fact done a better directing job that Francis Ford Coppola. I know, I know. That's kind of a bold statement, but it's true. And I may never have known this if I looked beyond the critical perception of these two movies and given Cabaret the chance it deserved.

I don't want to say much more because the movie may be appearing eventually on my "Top 100 Movies of All Time" list, so I'll just leave you with my favourite song and end it there. Unfortunately embedding was disabled, so click the link instead.

"Money"

Top 100 Movies of All Time: #95

95. MODERN TIMES (1936, CHARLIE CHAPLIN)

Starring: Charlie Chaplin, Paulette Goddard

I am pretty sure that this was one of the Chaplin movies that I didn't see until university. Back in high school, I was first introduced to the genius of Chaplin with City Lights and then subsequently The Gold Rush. After those two films, I did what I could to seek out any more of his work that I could, but that search led me to The Great Dictator and not much else.

So it came as a rather big shock to me when I was sitting in a communications lecture during first year, and the prof decided that he was going to use the lecture time to show us an assortment of clips for Modern Times. And it was brilliant. It was just absolutely hilarious. In the time that I had screened those other films in high-school, and this university class, I had totally forgotten how talented Charlie Chaplin really was.

What I love about Modern Times is that despite the rather simple nature of the whole film, every joke works time and time again. The way in which the events happen is very episodic, yet, you don't care. They are acting almost as individual little vignettes which beneath the surface, are all tightly wound together to make the premise of the whole film. The physical comedy that Chaplin evokes is just timeless as well. The bit at the beginning where he is tightening the nuts and bolts on the conveyor belt is some of the best commitment to a joke that I have ever seen. His coordination is flawless. And then of course there is the new "worker feeding machine" (which the above image is of). I would argue that that sequence is one of the funniest moments in any Chaplin film that I have seen... and it stays as funny, every time that I have seen it.

A large amount of credit is also due to Paulette Goddard. Despite having been made in the 1930's, she transcends the era and makes it look as though she could be playing this part from the present day. That might sound a bit odd, but think about it. When you watch an old movie like this, you are well aware of the era that it is set in because of the way the actors act, or the way they carry themselves, no?? Well, in this film, Goddard overcomes that, and makes it seem as though she is straight out of 1996, or any subsequent year.

My favourite scene in the film, was one that wasn't shown in that communications class. See, the reason that that prof showed us clips, was to initiate visuals about how industrialization was beginning to work at the turn of the century. The scene in which I deem my favourite was one that had nothing to do with industrialization, and thus, I hadn't seen it until I watched the film in full, during another (film) class. The part in the movie that I am referring to is the "The Nonsense Song" sequence. If you have never seen this movie, you may not know then that it isn't actually a silent comedy like the majority of Chaplin's work. It does rely heavily on that typical "silent" humour, but it is in fact Chaplin's first movie he made in the "sound" era.

Anyway, the scene that I love is the most prominent "sound" scene in the movie. Chaplin's Tramp has taken a job at a restaurant with Paulette, and is accidentally mistaken by the crowded room as the night's entertainment. So, he takes his place in the middle of the room, and then gives them all a song... consisting of no real words at all. Instead of taking the opportunity to allow the Tramp, the staple character of Chaplin's repertoire, to speak for the first time ever, he uses the scene to enhance the mystery of the character by having him sing in complete jibberish. The entire sequence is just pure gold, because it comes off as though it's a real song that he's singing. He plays to the crowd, and they laugh at him as though they get what he's joking about, yet there are no recognizable words... just a fake language that he seems to be making up on the spot. Here, watch for yourself:

In an era when silent pictures were becoming extinct, Chaplin embraces his silent film techniques, and makes an absolute classic sound picture without really saying any words at all.

"Honey I'm just trying, to make some sense, out of me."

Remember that time when I blogged, like, every day?? Or close to every day?? Well, it's time to start that shit up again. Summer officially began for me last night, and I plan to take total advantage of this free time by getting back into my writing.

And no, it's not going to be one of those times where I say it's time to write more, and then just fall back into the same pit of despair. No, not gonna happen. The semester is over, and I have no excuse. Well, I mean, I guess I will technically have an excuse, because I'm only off for a week and a half before my summer classes start up, but still!! It's not the same situation, so I'm getting to this thing again.

Or else... something. I don't really have the creative impulse to write something funny there, but SOMETHING will happen!! Perhaps involving pie... we'll have to see though.

Also, hey Jo!! Sorry I didn't write a huge long blog for you to procrastinate with the other day. I was too busy studying for exams and whatnot. I apologize.

"Speedy Gonzalez, why don't you come home??"

Hoping to spark myself into writing more consistently, I figured I'd keep this going with a second post for today. Back in November, I was pumping out like a post a day. I have less posts in 2010 so far than I did TOTAL for the month of November last year. Kind of bad.

Anyway, over the course of the last two days, I have been very "nostalgic". What do I mean by that?? Well, I have taken the last couple of days to discover a few things that I had not previously no experience with. Proof of this?? As I right this sentence, Rick Springfield is playing in the background. And it's both hilarious and awesome. I'm not talking "Jesse's Girl" either. Everyone knows "Jesse's Girl". I'm talking OTHER Rick Springfield. Fan. Tastic.

But the one thing that I had never paid any attention to until now, was a show that I had always written off as "trash". I had never been interested in it, because I always assumed it would be tacky and tasteless and not in the least scary. The show that I am referring to is "Tales From The Crypt" from the late 80's, early 90's. As it's pretty obvious to tell, all of my preconceptions were wrong wrong wrong.

On Friday, on one of the many blogs that I follow (ToplessRobot.com for anyone who's interested) they did a Top 10 list of the greatest ventriloquist dummy centered stories. Now, having always been a tad terrified by ventriloquist dummies, my interest in them had always been quite heavy. Isn't that the way it goes though?? If something scares us, we tend to be intrigued by anything involving that particular thing. Hell, when I'm bored, it normally results in me youtubing videos of Sharks and Spiders and such. Happened tonight actually.

Back on track though. I was checking out this list about ventriloquist dummies, and was familiar with a few of the entries on the list, and laughing at a few of the really obscure, 1950's B-Movie ones. But at number 5 on the list (or thereabouts), an entry called "The Ventriloquist's Dummy" appeared, and it caught my eye. It seemed somewhat contemporary, which confused me, because other than the whole "Goosebumps" episodes set around "Slappy" the dummy, I didn't think there was a movie or an anthology series that would have been around recently to cover the subject. So I read on.

Obviously, I soon discovered that it was an episode of "Tales From The Crypt". Normally, I would have just kept on going down the list, but I had to stop for this one because a name jumped out at me: Don Rickles. This particular episode featured legendary comic Don Rickles as the main character. "Alright. Intrigue me" I thought. So I read on.

The plot synopsis sounded pretty standard. I realized that it also starred Bobcat Goldthwait, which was neither a plus, or minus in it's favour. But there was also a youtube link to the entire episode. This was really compelling to me. I was in the middle of procrastinating on an essay anyway, so why not, I clicked on the video, and started watching the thing.

Right at the beginning, I wasn't fully into it. It seemed kind of cheesy, and a little too campy. But, the quality was better than "The Twilight Zone" reboot, which I have watched a lot of, so I hung in there and gave it the time to get into itself. About half way into the episode, I was hooked.

It was sick. It was twisted. It was funny. But most importantly of all, it was not what I expected. And I'm not just talking quality either. I mean, the actually plot of this particular episode caught me completely by surprise when the big reveal happens at the very end. I mean, I thought I had it figured out. It seemed stereotypical enough. Dummy controls ventriloquist. Ventriloquist goes crazy. Popcorn, credits, curtain.

No way. My jaw literally dropped from the shock of the twist, and how hilariously disgusting it really is. I was under the impression that there were no more twist endings out there. Everything had been done. And then I watched this, and I have been completely re-invigorated with hope that there are still ideas to be had. If you have the 25 minutes to spare, I recommend given it a glance:

So of course, my next course of action after finishing this episode off, is to seek out other ones from the series. And to my luck, youtube had a bunch. So I watched another one. And another. And by jove, they just kept getting better and better. All of them, with their mix of maniacal humour and horrifying gore, harken back to the beginnings of Sam Raimi's career, or Peter Jackson's. This show was exactly what "The Twilight Zone" for the 1990's should have been. I'm so pissed it took me this long to figure this out.

Now, not all of the episodes that I have seen end up having that same "100% Awesomeness Guaranteed" mantra, but they are all, in the least, entertaining to watch. Probably the best one I have seen so far is "Carrion Death", about a criminal who escapes prison (played by Kyle MacLachlan) and is pursued by an officer in the desert. The two engage in a fight, where the officer handcuffs the criminal to himself. Of course, the criminal shoots and kills the cop, but not before the cop swallows the handcuffs keys. So now, the criminal has to try and make it through the desert, to Mexico, with the dead body of the cop attached to him at the wrist. How fucking amazing is that!? It's so very good. "Cutting Cards" is phenomenal as well. Lance Henrikson is in that one.

Anyway, over the past few days I have been biding my time with this show and wondering to myself why we don't have any of these awesome things any more. Like, where is our anthology horror series?? Or where is our Rick Springfield?? Or where is our Brat Pack?? (Sorry, I watched The Outsiders last night for the first time, and it was okay, but why can't we have a group of awesome kids like that in Hollywood today?? Ralph Macchio!? C. Thomas Howell!?).

The naughts were a weak decade peeps. Very, very weak.

Playlists: Exams

It feels as though everything that has been posted on my blog recently has begun with an apology to myself for neglecting writing on here. So, instead of doing that this time (because, let's face it, it's happened again) I'm just going to dive right into the post.

This is the second installation of the whole "playlist" thing. I figure a month later (give or take) is when I normally rotate my songs on my iPod and such, and although there are always a couple of carryovers that stick with me for elongated periods of time, there are always a couple new entries into the ol' electronic record player.

Without further ado, I give you my "Exams" playlist...

"Ten Million Slaves" by OTIS MILLER

If the song title doesn't ring a bell, then you will probably recognize it as the main track (it's not OFFICIALLY the main track, but it's the one most prominently featured) in Michael Mann's very, very less-than-mediocre Public Enemies. This song is great for two reasons: 1) I love hearing it and being reminded of the movie's trailer which was SO awesome. It makes me forget for a second that the movie itself never lived up to the quality of the stellar preview in which this song was featured. 2) Miller's mix of old-school folk/blue grass and contemporary electric rock is perfect. There is this aura around the song that allows it to almost transcend time. It harkens back to the 1930's but sounds like it was made yesterday. In accomplishing that, it meshes together a gumbo full of southern rock essence. Fantastic.

"Bad Things" by JACE EVERETT

The "True Blood" theme song?? You betcha. Do I watch "True Blood"?? Absolutely not. I just love the opening of it. I wish the show could have lived up to that. Oh well. The song from the opening credits is wicked. In every sense of the term. It's badass country at its best.

"Work in Progress" by SISTER HAZEL

Probably my second favourite band behind Counting Crows, Sister Hazel have always, always, always put out music that I love. "Work in Progress" continues to pop up on my playlists every now and then because it's a massively upbeat tune with a harsh reality behind the lyrics. Besides finding that I relate to being a "work in progress" as they preach, I love the way that they develop the personality of the song. For some reason I relate it to Ben Folds' "Song for the Dumped" in that they are almost making excuses but in an "in-your-face" kind of way, so as to not lose face with anything. Have I read to far into this?? Perhaps. But either way, it's a fantastic song that strays away from their more soft rock-esque music and falls into a category basically by itself. It's fast. It's catchy. And it's great to boost your confidence after writing an exam you think you did pretty well on.

"American Saturday Night" by BRAD PAISLEY

The inclusion of Brad Paisley's newest one is on here really just due to the fact that it's Brad Paisley's newest. Simple as that. The man is probably the best male country artist working today and everything that he produces is usually fucking gold. This song is no exception. I haven't loved it as much as "Celebrity" or "Online" quite yet, but it's at least on the same level as "The World" or "Alcohol". Especially considering I haven't been up to date on my country ever since a lot of the new artists started sounding the same, it is good to know that Paisley is still around producing some great, new classics. Very reassuring.

"Private Conversations" by LYLE LOVETT

When I was younger, I hated Lyle Lovett for no other reason than I thought he was too weird looking to have married Julia Roberts. And I've never had any excessive feelings for Julia Roberts either, I was just against someone that odd marrying outside of his own league. Apparently when I was younger, I had celebrity marriage issues. Anywho, now that I've grown, and luckily happened upon some of my dad's music, I have heard some of Lovett's music. And by golly is it awesome. With "Private Conversations", I have yet to have mastered the actual lyrics themselves, but it has such an awesome, gentle tone that I haven't needed to learn the words quite yet. I enjoy just listening to the smoothness of it while walking to campus in the morning. It really helps to relax me, which I definitely need sometimes.

"Ready to Run"

I guess it has been too long since I have written an essay. I'm sitting here, needing to get this piece of crap done and finished and I'm drawing a huge blank. I cannot get past the first sentence. I type something. It's shit. I delete it. I type something else. No better than before. Delete, delete, delete. I don't know what the hell's the matter with me (and trust me, there is something wrong). I just can't get over this hump that has been hanging over my head for so long. It's been months, and I am getting no where. I need to get this essay done. Have to. Need to get going. Need to produce something good. No. Not something good. Just words. I need to produce words.

Anxiety.

"I Saw Her Again Last Night"

When you are making an attempt to get yourself back on a decent sleeping schedule (as I almost always seem to be) you wind up with a lot of excess time on your hands. Now, the smart side of me would use this time to finish the work that has been and which will continue to pile up over the next two weeks. In doing this, I would assure less stress on my life, a more cohesive body clock and well, probably happiness in general would fall upon me.

So, it should come as no surprise to anyone that instead of using my time for what is ultimately, happiness, I am instead using it to diddle around on the life-stealer that is the internet.

Today I have been awake since 3:30 am. In that time, I have actually done a couple of productive things. Most notably, I was able to get a mountain of dishes washed and put away. I also took in some delicious McDonald's breakfast for the first time since the beginning of the semester which was nice to be awake for. Other than that though, I have spent to good portion of my "awakeness" on youtube watching bad movies and checking out old movie trailers. I have watched a couple episodes of "Scrubs" and "Friends". I went downstairs and paid some of my rent. Basically, very little to write home about.

Something that I did come across today though was a little piece of nostalgia that I had to watch a couple of times over. It came in the form of Mickey Rooney, singing/raving about seeing a dragon in the Disney movie Pete's Dragon. It never really dawned on me how fond of this film I used to be as a child. I mean, when I think back now, I always recall my love for the fully animated Disney films that filled a lot of my time when I was in front of a TV. But, after watching this song (check it out below this post...because it is wonderful) I realized that I love this song. And quite few other songs from this movie. And the more I searched the more I came to the conclusion that I remember it quite thoroughly.

So I may be in the red as far as school work goes, but I am for damn sure in the black when it comes to my monthly nostalgia quota. So thank you Mickey Rooney and Helen Reddy. I adore you both in this clip.

"What's in it for me in your murky treasury??"

Not sure why I'm starting to see this every where I go, but I have been finding pretension in everyone I am around lately. Save for my family, arrogance in a condescending manner just seeths from the personalities of every person I come into contact with. Close friends, acquaintances, friends of friends, stories about friends of friends. Everybody. And it makes me sick. Not sick in a disgusted type of way, but sick in a disappointed one. It makes me irritated to know that this is all happening right in front of my face and they aren't realizing that it is happening.

And the worst part is that I find myself instituting the same illness. I will replay a conversation in my head, minutes after it was over, cursing myself for coming off as a know-it-all-holier-than-thou pretentious jackass, when it was never ever called for. And that infuriates me. To know that at some point in time I acted as though I knew my opinion was worth more than the person I was speaking to. I don't care if I, or anyone else, actually thinks that to themselves, that's fine. And hell, there are even moments in real life when expressing your "expertise" is called for. But honestly, an un-instigated outpouring of downright arrogance just doesn't sit right with me, especially when I come to the realization that I have commit exactly that act. 

I just don't know why I recognize it now more than ever in every person I meet. I don't know if I'm misinterpreting or there really is a pretension epidemic taking place, but I do know I want to be away from it for awhile. I just wish I knew how to accomplish that.

Playlists: Spring and Sprung

If there is one thing that I freely admit above all else, it's that I don't really know my music. I mean, I know what kind of music I like, but really, it's on a song to song basis, and rarely do I like an artist enough to listen to their entire discography. However, like I said, I know what I like, and I like it. So, I thought this would be a fun idea that might become a running thing (and would fill up time, which is the real benefit) by listing my "BEGINNING OF SPRING PLAYLIST", going through what songs have been placed into constant repeating over the past few weeks. No, I don't know as much about music as you do, but if you really do consider yourself a "music connoisseur", then maybe taking a gander at some of these tunes will help to broaden that pallet.

Let's begin.

"Toes" by THE ZACK BROWN BAND

It should indeed be mentioned that this song isn't specifically a "Springtime" song, because, as it turns out, it helped me get through the winter as well. And I'll put money down it will still deliver during the summer as well. But Zac Brown and is band have provided what is unquestionably the best country tune I have heard in the last year. Whenever it comes on my iPod I can't help but listen to it two times over, and attempt to refrain from singing along as to abolish any chance I have of embarrassing myself in a public place. A few times, I have definitely caught myself mouthing the words, and yet, I don't even care. It's awesome enough that I don't find myself minding the embarrassment.

After listening to the song, it might become apparent to you that it is all about going to Mexico and doing nothing but getting drunk and forgetting the hustle and bussell of the rat race back home. And then you will ask yourself, "why in the world do YOU like this Gray?? You don't get drunk or dream of that situation." Well, this is true. But it's more the imagery of it all. The ability to stop what I'm doing right then and there and go away to take it easy. Spend my time on a beach with a cold drink and beautiful girls. I don't actually want that but it sure as hell makes for a nice day dream, doesn't it. I actually start to feel more relaxed when this song begins to play. It's in the same vain as Jimmy Buffett for me. I don't want to be in Margaritaville, but I do long for something easier than this. And that's how Zack Brown helps.

So good.

"Broken" by TIFT MERRITT

There is something about Tift Merritt's vocals in this song that just makes me fall in love with her. I can't even really explain it, but all I know is that when I hear "Broken" I just want to hug something. It's soft and sweet, like the way a warm cookie tastes straight out of the oven. I don't have much more to say about this song, except that I adore it. And Tift Merritt. And I also love that name. Tift Merritt. Gorgeous.

"Brothers" by DEAN BRODY

You need a song to make you sad on your playlist too, don't you?? I think that's the rule, anyway. In that case, "Brothers" is that song. I actually came across this song by an accident. After I fell in love last summer with Dean Brody's "Dirst Road Scholar" I tried to access whatever else I could from his repertoire and this song is the only other one that really took. It's just one of those really touching country tunes that is meant for nothing else than to break your heart a little inside all the while making you feel a whole lot more complete. I know a few of you are thinking that "country song?? Supposed to be good?? HA!!" And it might not be your cup of tea. That's fine. But I find it hard to believe that you won't be at least a little bit moved by it, especially if you have a brother of your own.

I'm also just realizing now that all these songs so far have one word titles... time to change that.

"Sloop John B" by THE BEACH BOYS

This song actually came on the radio (I know, I almost forgot those existed) the other day, and it triggered my Beach Boys phase that I go through every once in a while. I didn't wanna put all of their songs on this list, so I've just opted to put the one that inspired me to start listening to them again.

"Sloop John B" works perfectly because to me, it feels as though this song should be played while someone pulls back a curtain on the winter weather, to reveal a bright and sunny re-birth of everything green and beautiful. That's what Spring is. And this song helps me anticipate all of that. It also helps me to want summer, so I have that going for me as well.

"This Must Be The Place" by MILES FISHER

I'm actually at nearing the end of my phase that included this song, but I figured it still comes on my iTunes enough, and I listen to it, that it still deserves a spot on this list. We'll call it a transition song, from the Winter to the Summer.

There might be a few of you who have either never heard of this song, or recognize it from a facebook post I included it on during last summer where it was featured for having an incredible video that is based around American Psycho. Miles Fisher is actually damn talented. He seems kind of douchy in real life, but I rather enjoy his music. And that's saying something, because it's very techno heavy, and that's not up my alley chico. I think the real appeal of the song to me comes from it's "walkability". Very few songs work as well as this one when walking anywhere, with my earphones in, stepping to the beat. Especially when you walk at quick pace as I tend to. Oh and for those of you wondering, "walkability" was not underlines with a red squiggly from spell check. Does that mean it's an actual word?? Really?? Weird.

"Gunpowder and Lead" by MIRANDA LAMBERT

My apologies for going so country heavy on this list, but I didn't realize until right now that that's actually where my music-heart has been as of late. I mean, is there really a better genre of music to spark the beginning of outdoors and sunshine and warm weather?? Oh, there is?? Well then... keep it to yourself!!

Miranda Lambert is one of the few female country stars I actually seem to like. I mean music wise. She doesn't have that "pop" that Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood has. It's replaced by the real Nashville twang, which, I adore. She has a number of good songs, and is very consistent with her music, but "Gunpowder and Lead" is just so intoxicating that I'm always so pumped right after I listen to it. This is kind of weird because the whole song is about a girl waiting to get revenge on the man who used to beat her. Hell, the actually lyrics are "I'm going to show him what little girls are made of, Gunpowder and Lead!!". Still though, despite not being a girl, my intensity levels shoot through the roof after hearing this song, and I love it. A little bit of me wants to go out and fight douche bags after it's over.

"I should have learned to rope and ride."

I am sick, a rare occurrence in my life. Some time yesterday, my head became full and my nose began to run. Progressively since then, I have become weakened. It has not turned on me at this point yet, so my own diagnosis is that it's a simple cold...for right now.

What I blame this whole thing on is one solid night of not being able to get to sleep. I laid in my bed, tossing and turning all night, unable to stop thinking about being called a "racist" the previous day. That's right. I was up until 4am being bugged by some anonymous internet hacks calling me "socially intolerant" for a graphic that I did in the newspaper. How I actually allowed this kind of thing to get under my skin I have zero idea, but it did, and I was up until 4am because of it.

Then, at 6:30 I was woken up to the sounds of angry banter from the neighbors next to my apartment. Something was going down, and the couple did not care who heard. The guy was pissed at something, and eventually threw something against the wall that we share. It was a full on scream fest. Such a shitty way to start your day. Oh, and something happened with the dog that they have too. I heard the dog begin to bark, then a smack, then the dog retaliating and then another thump, and no more dog.

So, I awoke to the thought that the people living next door to me had become so enraged with one another that their dog was killed in the process. I have no idea if that's what happened, and I do not intend to find out, but that is how my day started. 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Yelling. Dead dog. Class at 10 that I had to show up to ask a question in. All of this adds up to me, sitting here, right now, unable to stop sniffling and feeling as though my head is a hundred pounds.

In a valiant attempt to try and not to think about being sick though, I am opting to fill some time by being here on my blog, which I have somehow managed to neglect over the course of the last month. I know that no one really cares that I haven't been on, but, I still feel some ill-will towards myself for not being on here and pumping out some drivel. As you may have noticed from my last post, the last little bit has been filled with quite a bit of non-motivation.

What I wanted to write about though, I don't think fits in with the beginning of this blog, as I seemed to have turned it into an explanation as to why I've been absent/sick. Okay, I'll start a new one then. Stay tuned.

Oh, I would leave you with the graphic I was called racist for, except it isn't letting me post it for some reason. Says "internal error". I'll post it eventually, or, in the mean time, you can see it on my most recent note on facebook about "My End of the Year in Film".

I had absolutely no intention of it coming off that way. I was literally working with the colour scheme and nothing else. I hope I won't have to deal with this crap as graphics editor for the newspaper next year if I get the position.

P.S. I applied for graphics editor at the newspaper next year.